CH-CH-CH_Changes
People always say:
“When you have a baby, everything changes”
“Oh my god, your life ends when you have a baby!”
“Why are you having a baby so young? You should go out and live your life!”
“Unless you have help around the house or someone to look after your kid, your life will end!”
Well, let me share with you what my life has been like so far and respond to these reactions…
Let’s take care of the first statement: No, your life does not change…not completely anyway.
Your life does not end.
In my personal opinion, when you have a baby your life actually begins — again.
Let me tell you how my husband and I did it:
We didn’t change much in the way we live our lives.
We simply re-adjusted some things so that Mel can fit right in with us.
I wouldn’t want to resent having Mel and I think if I had completely changed the way my life worked then maybe I would have just like many women out there resented ever having a baby.
Instead I get to do many of the things I always did but now with a little person by my side.
It’s all about how well you work things out and what you are willing to adjust to make sure everyone is happy.
For example: We’re planning to go on a trip to Italy in April (more details on that trip and how we are working that out in a few weeks).
I could leave Mel behind with her grandparents, they wouldn’t mind at all, and have a great time with my husby but to be honest I don’t believe I would enjoy it as much.
My brain would be back home with Mel, and I would be wondering if she’s alright or if somehow she needed me.
Traveling with Mel will definitely be an adjustment but we are willing to try.
We honestly take her everywhere we go and if we need a night out or a lunch or some sort of a small one on one break we take it.
But, you can be damn sure that my life hasn’t been stopped and neither has my husband’s.
We still have our traditional weekly BBQs at the house as well as the weekly poker night and the annual Christmas party in a few weeks.
Being a parent is hectic and exhausting but I knew what I was signing up for.
I had this baby girl to be able to start a new adventure in a different direction.
There is something to be said about having children: you really need to want to have them and understand that life will slightly change to a certain extent.
I’m not too young to have a child. I am the perfect age.
I wanted to be able to have the energy to do absolutely everything with my children and I plan on having many of them — hey! I know your jaw dropped, now put it back in its place — we want a big family, deal with it.
Seeing as to how I want that, I needed to plan the timing appropriately, and it is all working according to that plan.
As for going out and living my life, I lived, am living, and will continue to live with my husband, my children and my family — that is how I always viewed my life and at the end of the day it is my choice.
I do not have help that lives in my home with us, and we never wanted it.
In Lebanon, it is part of the current culture to have live in nannies, or maids taking care of the children, and that is not at all something that my husband and I ever even thought about.
I wasn’t raised that way nor do I want to raise my kids that way.
Maybe one day, if I end up having a ton of kids and can’t seem to handle it, I would think about, it but at this very moment, my husband and I are doing all the work.
And what’s the best part you ask?
Our lives haven’t ended…
Mama Shugar OUT!
